How to Survive a Long-Distance Relationship During a Pandemic
I haven’t seen my boyfriend for over 8 months and I feel as if I am going insane. I’ve searched the web for some relief and found some great articles to share with the community. I’ve also included a list of quarantine tips and activities to help you survive a long-distance relationship during a pandemic.
Other helpful long distance relationship articles:
- Long-Distance Relationship Monthly Date Ideas
- Important Self-Care Tips for Long Distance Relationships
- Free Video Call Group Games
Finding the Silver Lining to Dating during a Pandemic
It is important to address the hardship and mental exhaustion that couples are facing right now. Long-distance relationships are hard but who would have thought it could be harder.
I have been in a long-distance relationship (LDR) for more than 3 years and as many couples can relate, distance is a normal part of the relationship. But this time it feels different.
Some important motivational factors for LDR couples are future visits and to have something to look forward to. However, with the constant travel bans and changes, it is getting harder to stay hopeful.
It’s important to remember:
- uncertainty can impact people differently. It can be very hard for certain individuals
- the holidays are coming up and many couples are missing much-needed quality time
Although it sounds hopeless, Lori Gottlieb a renowned psychotherapist and author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone answered some important long-distance relationship concerns on Goop, shedding some positive light on the situation.
Lori mentions that “the pandemic is bringing up two things: the first is preexisting issues in relationships that maybe people didn’t know were going on.”1
“But the second is that the stress and distance are bringing up so many things that people don’t normally realize—how strongly they’re connected to their partners, how grateful they are for their partners, and how glad they are to be going through this with this particular person. And the tally of all the things they’re missing right now is evidence of how much they really love this person.”1
Your long-distance relationship will survive the pandemic and will be stronger after all of this.
If you are curious about Lori’s advice to the questions below, make sure you read the article on Goop.
- What advice do you give to clients experiencing new challenges with long-distance relationships because of the pandemic?
- How can couples work through long-distance misunderstandings?
- How do you cope with the lack of proximity and physical touch?
Tips to Survive a Long-Distance Relationship During a Pandemic
- Set-up non-negotiable date nights.2
Matt Lundquist a NYC-based psychotherapist highlights in this article that you need to build anticipation and have something to look forward to. Be intentional and dedicate special time for you and your partner.
2. Send voice notes and videos. My boyfriend sends voice notes on specific topics so I can refer back to them when I want to revisit certain topics.
3. Use this time period to get to know your partner
Learn if you are truly compatible with each other. Take online free quizzes to learn about your personality type, strengths and weaknesses. You can check out the 16 personalities test, the love language quiz and the enneagram personality test.
4. If you are running out of relationship activities, check out this article from Modern Love Long Distance. They also have a lot of helpful resources for long-distance couples.
5. You will be video calling a lot so make sure you have a cell phone stand with a charger slot.
*This post contains affiliate links. I may earn commissions from qualifying purchases from Amazon. There is no additional cost to you. Any support is appreciated as it helps me create more detailed posts. Learn more here.*
6. Remember how far you’ve come.
It’s a long journey and not everyone can survive the distance. I read a great article from Business Insider and it was a good reminder to remember how the little things go a long way.
7. Say what you want.
LDR couples are good at communicating their wants and needs but during this time period, it’s important to truly express what is on your mind.
This is a new situation for us all and it’s important to give your partner the space to express any difficult feelings they may be having.
An article by People.com emphasizes the importance to learn how to over-communicate.2 Lundquist suggests the following, “I would suggest couples who aren’t used to this to communicate more, even if it’s just a quick text letting your partner know you’ll be unavailable for a few days because of work, or whatever.”2
The most successful couples are those who are not afraid to express what they truly need. It is better to be honest with your partner so you can both work on the situation at hand.
8 Quarantine Activities to Survive a Long Distance Relationship and a Pandemic
- Write and send physical letters to your partner.
Check out, “Open Me When Letters” on Pinterest for content ideas.
2. Watch a Netflix series or a movie together.
Use the free google chrome extension called Teleparty. Formally known as Netflix Party, this is a platform to watch online movies together with others. There is a group chat feature and both parties have control of pausing/starting the movie.
3. Cook a meal and enjoy it together.
4. Have better conversations.
Ask more insightful questions to have meaningful conversations. Lori suggests asking the following questions:
- “How are you feeling?
- What was that experience like for you?
- How can I help?”1
5. This is a perfect time to video call more and planned cute dates.
Read this article by Modern Love Long Distance for some great facetime date ideas.
6. Play mobile games online.
I have been playing Tetris and Warzone with my boyfriend. Read about other free group mobile games here.
7. Plan monthly date ideas and mail the letters to your partner ahead of time.
This will build anticipation and excitement! It’s helpful to have pre-planned dates. If you need some ideas, check out my article here.
8. Plan your next trip together.
Travelling requires a lot of research so why not use this time to plan ahead. Although you may not know when you will see your partner next, it will be fun to have an itinerary ready. Check out this article from USA Today, for more ways to keep your relationship fun during a pandemic.
Is There Hope for Couples in Long Distance Relationships?
The beauty in this all is “that when this is all over, we might come out of it with a greater sense of appreciation and gratitude for the partner we’ve chosen.”1
“When we start to emerge from this, what are some things do we want to do together? What are some things we’re experiencing now that we’re going to laugh about later? And you know, people truly reveal themselves in times of a crisis: What are you learning about your partner that you didn’t know before the pandemic, and how did you get closer to each other?”1
These are turbulent times that not many couples can handle. If you’ve made it this far, I want to recognize the hardships you’ve had to overcome. It is not easy and you are a trooper!
For more related content and long-distance relationship stories, follow @mylynh.nguyen on Instagram.
Sources
- https://goop.com/wellness/relationships/long-distance-relationship-during-a-pandemic/
- https://people.com/lifestyle/how-to-make-long-distance-relationships-work/
Let’s Connect:
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